


Alt. Umbrella Terms

by brushstrokesApocalyptic



Series: An Umbrellaverse [2]
Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Gen, Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-09-24
Packaged: 2018-12-18 10:57:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11872911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brushstrokesApocalyptic/pseuds/brushstrokesApocalyptic
Summary: Deleted scenes and could-have-beens from the fic An Umbrella Term.





	1. Deleted Scene: Carey's Tricks

**Author's Note:**

> so this isn't gonna be so much a sequel as much as a bunch of scenes i was planning on/thinking of including but didn't for one reason or another! they basically fall into two categories, which i'm planning on alternating between: Deleted Scenes, and Could-Have-Beens.
> 
> Deleted Scenes are scenes that could have actually been included in the fic with little to no disturbance to the plot, but which i decided not to include because they weren't strictly necessary and i wanted to get to the stuff that mattered more. for instance, this first one was going to go at the beginning of chapter 5, but then i decided it was an abrupt departure from everything else that was happening, and had very little to do with the rest of the plot! but i'd already written half of it, which is more that can be said for most of these things, so i figured i'd make this here collection to give it a place to live.
> 
> Could-Have-Beens are scenes that i was thinking of including, but didn't because the plot steered dramatically away from that direction. for instance, different ideas of how the Lucretia Confrontation Scene could have gone, or even the fact that this dang novel was originally gonna be a one-shot. these are gonna be rather a lot more dramatic than the Deleted Scenes, on account of most of the hypothetical scenes i actually remember from the developmental process inside my head are very dramatic, whereas the Deleted Scenes are just cute scenes here and there which i simply didn't write.
> 
> these chapters will be a lot shorter than An Umbrella Term's ever were, on account of them being like, single scenes instead of entire chapters. on the other hand, that'll probably balance out the fact that i don't have these pre-written this time so the update schedule will be hopefully not painfully slow, so! we'll see.
> 
> hope you enjoy!

“Hey, Carey, can you show me how you pickpocket people?”

Carey blinks down at Angus, then glances around, then narrows her eyes down at him. “Hey, this isn’t part of a plot to incriminate me in some theft that happened, is it? Because I already gave everything back—”

“No, I’m being serious!” Angus insists. “I wanna know how you can take things without anyone knowing— just because I think I’ll be useful to know.”

Carey huffs, leaning down a little to meet his eyes. “Aren't you a detective, kiddo?” she asks. “Stealing doesn’t seem like your kinda thing.”

“It’s— not, mostly,” Angus admits, shuffling his feet. “But it’s not always easy to get evidence in more…  _ official… _ ways… and it’ll help for when Magnus plays keep-away with my books?”

Carey shrugs. “Works for me.”

Angus grins and bounces on his heels. “Great! When can we start?”

“Right now,” Carey says, grinning widely. She turns to saunter down the hall, motioning for Angus to follow. “Watch and learn, kiddo.”

He follows a couple steps behind, keeping an eye on her movements as she casually shoves her hands in her pockets and starts humming a little tune.

Avi comes out around a corner abruptly and Carey fails to dodge completely, shoulder bumping against him, and they both mutter apologies before continuing on their way.

But Angus’s eyes are faster— he catches the small flicker of blue scales when they touch, and sure enough when Carey and Angus turn the corner Carey pulls out a small bottle of bourbon. “Ugh, more alcohol,” Carey says, sticking her tongue out as she strains to pop the top off. “I swear, that guy’s got a problem.”

“Okay, I saw that you did something,” Angus says, adjusting his glasses, “But I didn’t catch exactly how you did it.”

“‘S simple,” Carey says, digging her teeth into the cork and twisting her head to tug it off. She spits the cork out into her hand and holds it up. “You saw how I kept my hands in my pockets as long as possible? Helped me hide what was in them, and then most of the actual stealing involved keeping attention away from what I’m doing with my hands. It’s all getting close without it being considered weird.”

“So— that’s why you bumped into him?” Angus asks. “To get close enough.”

“Yeah,” Carey says, downing a gulp of the bourbon and wiping her mouth. “Though it’s one of the better known tricks in the book, so I’d advise against it unless you can get far, far away before the target realizes their stuff is missing.”

Sure enough, as Carey lifts the bottle back to her lips, Avi comes skidding around the corner with an annoyed look on his face. “Come on! I was looking forward to that one!”

“Case in point,” Carey says, gesturing vaguely with the bottle.

Avi marches over, snatching the bottle back as Carey gives him a cheeky grin, and then blinks when he finally notices Angus standing right beside him. “Oh, Angus! What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to ask Carey about pickpocketing,” Angus says, folding his arms behind his back.

Carey grins even wider, her tail swishing from side to side. “I’m corrupting the youth of tomorrow.”

“Don’t do that, Carey,” Avi says, swatting her hand away from where it strays dangerously near his hip flask. “What’s a detective learning pickpocketing for?”

“Detective stuff?” Carey shrugs. “I’ll be honest, I instantly forgot his reasoning—”

“Because I can’t always gather evidence the official way!” Angus pipes up. “Because sometimes the person you’re— I’m investigating, sometime the person I’m investigating isn’t being suspected by anyone else but I’m sure they did it and I just need proof!”

Avi gives him a thoughtful look. “How do you show anyone the evidence, though? Would you tell them you stole it?”

“I—” Angus pauses, then shrugs. “I’d work something out?”

“Maybe work out your excuse  _ before _ you do the stealing,” Carey suggests, resting her arm on Angus’ shoulder.

“I— yeah,” Angus says.

Carey nods, then perks up. “So! Wanna see another way of doing things?”

 

* * *

The cafeteria isn’t as bustling as it can get, but there’s still a decent number of people around, enough that Carey and Angus have to weave between them to get anywhere.

“Watch my hands,” Carey says before they step inside, and Angus does so— tagging a couple feet behind as they wind their way towards the food counter.

(“The most important thing is to have no one suspect you’re even planning on stealing from them,” Carey had said on the way here. “The best way is to have them not even know you’re there— but you don’t have to be outright hiding to do it.”

“How else would you do it, though?” Angus asked.

“How much attention do you pay to the people around you when you’re in a crowd?” Carey asked, and then held up a hand the moment Angus opened his mouth to answer. “No, don’t answer that, you hyperaware little genius— most people  _ don’t _ pay any attention to that. Crowds are the best place to go pickpocketing, especially if there’s something else for them to pay attention to.”)

Carey’s hands are fast, flickering in and out in a flash— the people she steals from are always facing away, and the things she steals are never more valuable than little baubles that she moves into different people’s pockets. She pauses to stare at the unholy abominations labeled as pizza slices, and Angus leans over next to her.

“Do you do that kinda thing often?” he asks, pulling out his notebook from a bag. “Switching people’s stuff around, I mean.”

Carey blinks, gives the notebook a suspicious look, then nods subtly. “It’s good practice.”

Angus nods back, flipping to one of the unsolved mysteries.  _ Killian and Leon’s stones of farspeech got swapped? _ it reads, and Angus quickly scratches that out and writes next to it,  _ Carey did it. _

Carey peeks over Angus’s shoulder and grimaces. “Geez, I didn’t realize you were investigating so many of my goofs— I did that one and that one too, also.”

Angus blinks up at her, then crosses out the indicated mysteries. “Why do you keep doing this?” he asks.

Carey shrugs. “‘Cause it’s funny, and I get bored up here between missions and training. Plus, this is like, bonus training, but more fun.”

Angus glances down at the long list of mysteries, all proven to be Carey’s doing. “...I think you’re overdoing it a little, ma’am.”

“Maybe,” Carey says, shrugging. “C’mon, let’s go see what Magnus has in his pockets!”

“It’s just gonna be carpentry tools, ma’am!” Angus calls, hurrying after Carey when she makes a run for the door.

“You don’t know for sure!” Carey calls back. “That’s the fun of it!”

 

* * *

(Angus is right. A carving knife, a small hammer, and wood shavings. And a wooden duck, but that’s basically guaranteed at this point.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OH EDIT: [CHECK OUT!!! A FANART VAGUELY OF AN UMBRELLA TERM. IS THIS REALLY THE BEST PLACE TO BE PUTTING THIS???? IDK](http://brushstrokesapocalyptic.tumblr.com/post/164458931669/)


	2. Could-Have-Been: A Quieter Confrontation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angus has something to tell Lucretia.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> defs a slower update speed then
> 
> anyway, this was one of my earlier ideas for how the lucretia confrontation could go! you could consider this kinda like an AU Where Lup Didn't Take Down The Lich Ward if you want, considering that's... basically exactly what made me scrap it, me realizing that lup wouldn't Not confront lucretia herself if she could.

“Ma’am Director? Are you busy?”

Lucretia looks up with a start at Angus’s quiet voice, finding the door of her office cracked open just wide enough for him to peek through. “I mean, that rather depends on how much of my attention you require,” she says, setting down the documents she’d just been studying. “Come in, what do you need?”

“Um, it’s— it’s really not that urgent, if you’re at all busy,” Angus stutters out, taking a tiny step inside and keeping his arms folded behind his back. “I can, uh, I can come back another time—”

“Angus,” Lucretia cuts in, steepling her fingers. “I can’t possibly be so busy that I can’t take a moment to hear you out. Is there a problem?”

Angus makes a small noise, eyes fixed firmly on the floor, and then he forces himself to step fully inside. He pushes the door shut behind him with one foot, still keeping his hands behind his back, and trudges over to stand in front of Lucretia’s desk. “You’re sure you’re not busy?”

Lucretia smiles, slightly, in a way that she hopes makes her seem a little less threatening.  _ He’s been so nervous lately, it can’t be good for him. _ “If I were, I’d think it’d be rather obvious. Sit down?”

Angus eyes the chair for a moment, but stays standing. He visibly steels himself, and then removes one hand from behind his back to place a small object on the table. “I’m the one who stole from you,” he says, audibly forcing the words to come out calmly as he slides the object across her desk.

It’s one of her books, familiar from the bold IPRE logo to the tiniest bit of wear along the edge. Lucretia stares at it for a moment, then looks back up at Angus. “Pardon?”

Angus shifts, not meeting her eyes. “I’m sorry, I had to, there were so many things that just added up to there being a second Voidfish and the only person it could have been was you and it had to be in your quarters and I needed to know for sure I’m sorry I should have just asked you—”

“Angus, Angus— wait— what are you saying?” Lucretia asks, feeling her chest tighten as she reaches to lay her hand on the book. “You— it was  _ you? _ Of all people?”

Angus swallows, eyes fixed firmly on the wall to his left, and nods. “I really didn’t want to but there wasn’t anything else I could have done to keep investigating and I’m really sorry?”

Lucretia takes a deep breath, picking up her journal. “And here I thought— I should have checked  _ everyone’s  _ dorms… you… where did you hide the baby Voidfish?”

Angus takes a deep breath. “I’m not going to tell you that,” he says, turning his head to meet her eyes. “I— you— I’ve read all the journals, that s— that I took, and I don’t— respectfully, I don’t agree with what you did. And I’m not gonna let you do it again.”

Lucretia stares back at him, the small, nervous frown on his face feeling ten times more like some final judgement on her character than any unrecognizing look her friends have ever sent her way.

“You weren’t there,” she finally says. “And I know exactly which books you took— you don’t know what it was like, what happened, what it was like after we created the relics—”

“No, I do,” Angus mutters. “I— I didn’t have to read it, I just— asked.”

“Asked who, Angus?” Lucretia asks, mind whirling through possibilities.  _ Could it have been the boys? No, they’d have made a scene if they remembered— Barry couldn’t be here, the lich ward… Lup? Same reason— _

“Lup told me,” Angus says, shifting his hands behind his back. “And I— And I know that seems a little weird? Since she’s been dead and missing for as long as I’ve existed in any form? Um, but— she’s been helping.”

Lucretia sighs, propping her head up with one arm. “I suppose I should have guessed, this whole conversation has been one wild revelation after another.”

“Oh, sorry— sorry, should I slow down?” Angus asks. “I just want— wanted to get it all out as fast as I could before I chicken out but I can slow down if this is too much—”

“No, best get it out,” Lucretia says, lifting her head. “What’s next, have you been conspiring with the Hunger? Is Barry Bluejeans hiding behind your back? The Power Bear lives in your hat.”

“Uh...” Angus looks a little blank. His arms shift again, but this time it’s more like he’s trying to hold something in place. “Um… I’m just as against the Hunger as you are, ma’am? But you— you’re not too far off with the second one.”

“Lay it on me,” Lucretia deadpans.

“Right, er.” Angus shifts, looking away again, visibly straining with whatever it is he’s holding and then he grimaces, meets Lucretia’s eyes, and says, “Duck?”

And Lucretia does so, more on instinct than anything when Angus stops fighting against the umbrella he’s holding. It swings, still in his hand but entirely under its own power, right through the air where Lucretia’s head just was— and then it slams against the desk over Lucretia’s head, and Angus protests weakly as the smell of smoke reaches Lucretia’s nose.

And then, a couple moments later, Angus pokes his head over to look at Lucretia. “Um. Ma’am? You can come out now.”

Lucretia narrows her eyes at him, but carefully picks herself up from the floor and steadies herself against the desk, where she finds two words burned right through the paperwork and into the grain of the wood.  _ FIGHT ME. _

And she looks at Angus, who looks sheepish with Lup’s umbrella hugged tight to his chest. “Lup says hi,” he squeaks out.

Lucretia stares silently, then after a long,  _ long _ moment sits down heavily in her chair. “Well,” she says, staring daggers at the umbrella, “That’s not quite where I’d envisioned finding you. I was more expecting… you, wandering some city, alive but without any memories.”

The umbrella forms a mage hand, which flips her off.

“Yes, thank you, very mature.” Lucretia sighs, rubbing at her nose. “So? We’re here, we’re having a conversation. What shall we discuss?”

Lup is silent and unmoving, and then Angus makes a small noise and digs out a notebook. He flips to a page near the back, unclips a pen, and lays it open on his side of the desk— at which point Lup takes the pen and writes,  _ ur doing everything wrong and as soon as im outta this dang thing i’m gonna kick ur wrinkly ass to the other moon where you can use ur dang shields to not suffocate. _

“I missed you too, Lup,” Lucretia says. “Um. Relevant to that subject. Whyyy did you have to steal from me…?”

_ hadta inoculate my bros _

“You do realize them remembering will just bring them greater heartbreak—”

_ too late already did it. taako says hiiiiiiiiii _

Lucretia rubs at her temples. “Why did I think you wouldn’t have. How long ago?”

“Just this morning,” Angus says, cutting off Lup before she can get more than a letter in on the paper. “Which, um— kinda prompted this? Because, they already know, and they’d let you know real soon too, and I wanted to get this over with on my own terms. And also to— and also to ask you to take down the lich ward so Taako can properly see his sister again. Because you’re obviously not gonna be able to undo the inoculation. Um. Unless you can? Can you do that?”

“Not to the best of my knowledge,” Lucretia says. Then she sighs yet again. “I… thank you for telling me all this, Angus, but… I don’t suppose you could leave Lup and I alone for a while? That is, if Lup doesn’t mind?”

Lup pauses, the writes,  _ take down the lich ward and i’ll consider it. _

“I… suppose the main reason I put it up is rendered somewhat pointless now that you’ve already told everyone,” Lucretia muses. “So— alright. Fine. Just— wait here?”

Angus nods, and Lup makes no move to stop her when she stands up, which Lucretia takes as an agreement. She walks to the heavy door in the back, pushes it open, and strides confidently through— ignoring the defenses as usual. Punch in the code for the keypad, step into her quarters, tug the holy symbol from its place in one smooth motion.

And it’s like a protective blanket has just been torn away. Lucretia shivers, turns around, and begins to walk back to her office— but then there’s a loud bang from that direction which gives her pause, and then a flaming spectre of red cloth tears through the air up to Lucretia and  _ screams, _ fire licking the air all around her, mere inches from her skin and clothes.

Lucretia just raises an eyebrow. “Are you done?” she asks, once Lup’s voice has trailed off somewhat.

“Yeah, I’m done,” Lup says, dousing the flames with a quick motion of her hand.

“Thank you,” Lucretia says, brushing past her. “So? Shall we discuss this matter like civilized people?”

“Pbbbhthhh, we can discuss it, but I dunno about that other part,” Lup says, drifting after her. “Also, just so we’re clear, I’m gonna give you one free punch after I’ve got a new body, and then we can discuss forgiveness.”

“Fair.”


	3. Deleted Scene: GARfield the DEALS warlock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angus buys a fishtank from the Fantasy Costco.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (khajiit has wares if you have coin)
> 
> this scene i think is the one that came closest to actually being included in the fic despite not getting written until literally last night? it was going to be in chapter eight, and you can actually find a line stating that these events _did_ happen, just offscreen. The only reason I didn't include it is because at the time i was writing the chapter the words for it just weren't coming? and i decided it was better to not include this one scene than to get caught up on a tiny snag for a week and never finish the fic. a small regret i have about it is that it resolves a tiny bit of sorta-foreshadowing i had when ango and johann were discussing guitars and angus mentioned his great grandfather who was rather large and more than a bit of an oddball? but it's a small sacrifice. ANYWAY onto the scene!

Angus didn’t start his day expecting to spend half of it in the Fantasy Costco doing comparison shopping for fish tanks, but here he is.

The entire building is disquietingly lacking in people, owing largely to the large event going on elsewhere in the Bureau— Angus wishes he could be there to honor Boyland’s passing, but he simply didn’t have the time. The only presence skulking between the towering shelves, apart from Angus, is the dreaded Deals Warlock himself; a fearsome figure of dark robes, wicked claws, fanged teeth, gleaming eyes, soft orange fur— Angus is only guessing on that last one, it looks real soft from a distance, but he’s never been brave enough to actually lay a hand on such a wicked entity.

All in all, though, the only sounds in the entire building are the sounds of Angus’s sneakers squeaking against the tile, the cloth of Garfield’s robe brushing against shelves, and the occasional distant, echoing ring of the Fantasy Costco jingle— though nobody ever actually enters the store.

Angus is busy eyeballing the size of a tank, trying to figure out where in his room he could fit it, when a dark shadow casts itself over him. “So, I noticed you’ve been looking at our aquarium selection a whole bunch,” Garfield says slyly, sidling up next to Angus. Angus inches away. “Looking to… adopt a couple fish?”

“Oh— oh, no, sir, I’ve already got a fish,” Angus says, deciding inching just isn’t doing it for him and taking a full step backwards. “Just— just looking to get a bigger tank!”

Garfield’s whiskers droop for a second, though his smile doesn’t budge an inch, and he leans in further. “Well, I could certainly help you out with that! What are you looking for? Fifteen gallon? Twenty? Or have you already decided?”

“I— I had something around this size in mind,” Angus says, motioning choppily at the tank he was looking at. “Um, maybe a little smaller? Anything bigger is a little out of my price range—”

“Oh-ho, but not with me,” Garfield says, eyes narrowing into slits as he rubs his paws together. “Would you care—”

“I also don’t have the space for anything bigger!” Angus quickly cuts in before Garfield can work too much financial wizardry on his mind. “I’m only—  _ only— _ interested in a tank of about this size. Not— I don’t wanna get into weird zany warlock deals with you right now, sir.”

Garfield sniffs. “Spoilsport. Are you sure?” he leans in even further. “Not even a little deal? Some extra feature I could give you? Free shipping? Fish food?”

Angus narrows his eyes. “What’d you want in exchange for that?”

“Hmmm...” Garfield makes a show of thinking it over, humming and hawing as long as possible to draw it out, before finally clicking his fingers. “Perhaps, one bonus feature in exchange for a scale?”

Angus blinks. “...Excuse me, sir? What do you mean?”

“Oh, don’t play dumb with me now mister detective! It’s all over your scent!” Garfield says, sniffing, and Angus leans away— “I’ve met plenty of sorcerers in my days, I could tell one thirty feet out on a windy day— you’re descended from a silver dragon, right? I don’t get a whole lot from those guys!”

Angus tenses, takes a step back, and folds his hands behind his back. “Why do you— what do you want that for anyway?”

“Oh, you know, things,” Garfield says, leaning on the shelf and waving a hand vaguely. “Honestly, I dunno what your whole deal hiding this thing is? All the other sorcerers I’ve met were cool with having sweet dragon magic, I don’t get why you’re not— but anyway, that’s not the point! One free bonus alongside a sale, in exchange for one scale!”

Angus stares at him, forcing his posture to relax, and he says, “It just— doesn’t come up, and I don’t wanna be known for what my grandpa was. And— and also, uh, even if I wanted to I couldn’t take that deal?” He rubs nervously at the back of his neck. “Because, um. Didn’t get that particular trait from him.”

Garfield blinks, seemingly surprised by this revelation. “What, really? I thought that was like, guaranteed with dragon sorcerers.”

Angus shrugs. “I dunno, it just— just never happened? I’m just a little more okay in cold temperatures than most people, and that’s it.”

“Well, you learn something new every day!” Garfield says, standing up. “But! The offer still stands, I’ll just ask for something else! What do you say, is there  _ anything at all _ I could persuade you to get in addition…?”

Angus looks down at the tank, considers it, and then asks, “Could you bring it directly to my room without anyone seeing it?”

“Certainly!” Garfield crows. “Hell, I’ll even cut the price in half for you! Or more! What do you say, perhaps, oh… ten gold for the tank itself, plus a little bonus for delivery. Which I say should be…” Garfield thinks it over, looking Angus up and down like he’s sizing him up, then points dramatically to Angus’s feet. “Those socks.”

Angus blinks and looks down. “My socks? Why?”

“Why not?” Garfield asks. “They’re just super cool socks is all, and I want them to put them up on my wall! My Facebook wall, on the Fantasy Internet!”

_ They’re just plain white gym socks, _ Angus thinks, but decides not to question Garfield’s tastes. “Alright, I, guess I can give that up?” Angus says, bending down to take his shoes off before Garfield speaks up.

“Oh, there’s no need to remove them yourself!” Garfield says. Angus looks up, a question on his lips, then stops when he sees a pair of white socks in Garfield’s paw— and when he looks down, he finds a distinct lack of socks on his feet, and when he looks back up he finds Garfield tucking the socks into his sleeve along with a handful of gold coins. “Pleasure doing business with ya! Your tank’s already in your room, do feel free to shop here again!”

Angus opens his mouth to question Garfield, but the enigmatic cat simply vanishes in a puff of smoke before he can get more than a syllable out. He stares at the spot Garfield just was for a moment, then takes a deep breath and starts resolutely walking back to the entrance, his business here…  _ apparently… _ finished. Apparently.

Which is, you know, par for the course in this weird-ass megastore.


	4. Could-Have-Been: A Louder Inoculation Pt. 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tres Horny Boys meet a Red Robe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well boy howdy how this was unexpectedly tough to write! and also almost turned into an entire alternate universe chapter, before i realized the scene i was starting to write was in fact separate enough from what came before it that it would be better in its own chapter. and that i'd already made y'all wait long enough for this one.
> 
> this was actually my main plan for how them boys would get inoculated, right up until i was writing the phandalin chapter and i realized no, there's no way i could get from there to this. that's. about all i'm saying read it now already!

It’s the sound of yells that gets their attention first. Magnus looks up from his axe and wonders aloud if there’s some party they’re missing, to which Taako replies with a shrug, and Merle asks who would bother having a party and not inviting at least one of them.

When they get closer, though, they quickly realize it probably  _ isn’t  _ a party— at least, not a very friendly one. The shouts are angry, or fearful, and punctuated by loud bangs and crashes and the crackle of magic in the air, sending Taako’s ears twitching up and down as they pick up the pace— and then they step out into the main courtyard, and find carnage.

Or, not quite. There’s no blood or anything, but there’s maybe a dozen unconscious guards strewn around the ground and half a dozen more dodging around fiery bolts of magic, totally disorganized in the face of— a red-robed spectre, floating in the center of the courtyard and crackling with magic, a wide grin visible under her hood.

Magnus doesn’t hesitate to rush in. He comes in full-throttle, springboards off the shoulders off one of the remaining guards to leap at the Red Robe as he back is turned— but he and his axe both phase right through her, sending him tumbling to the ground, and that’s when she pauses to look at him.

And then she says, in a voice that makes Taako’s ears perk up for reasons he can’t fathom, “Oh, you’re already here?”

Magnus picks himself off of the ground, turning quickly to stand on guard in front of her. “What do you mean?” he asks. “What are you doing here?”

“Uh, attracting attention by schooling some noobs,” she says, crossing her arms. Behind her, the springboard-guard limps away, and Taako can tell by the way one of her ears flicks that she heard it but just doesn’t care. “It’s just, I was kinda figuring I’d have to do some kinda extra-big thing to get your attention? ‘Cause you could’ve been anywhere on the base? But, uh, guess that also means you were close enough to hear the commotion.”

“That actually answers like, none of my questions,” Taako says, picking his way across the grass to stand a little behind and off to the side. “Like, uh, what the fuck? Is? Um. Why is there suddenly a Red Robe in the middle of the base?”

She shrugs, shooting a bolt just behind one of the guards trying to sneak off, getting him to take off running. “I dunno, I just woke up here,” she says, then pauses. “I mean, uh, on the moon. Not right here specifically. But hey, I wanna have a chat with you about something!”

Magnus narrows his eyes, helping a guard to their feet. “And what is that?”

“Have you considered that you’re fighting for the wrong person?” she asks, grinning.

“No, not in the slightest, next question,” Merle says, wandering over as he flips through the Extreme Teen Bible.

She pauses, maybe blinking— it’s hard to tell with her hood pulled low over her face— and then shrugs again. “Alright, that’s fair. And it’s not like she’s a bad person, just, uh, doing things wrong. But, no, you’re totally also doing the wrong thing by helping her and here’s why—”

Taako fires a volley of Magic Missiles at her, all of which phase right through her back. She turns slightly to give him a hurt frown, but Taako is having none of it. “Look, I don’t really care what you were about to say there— who the hell do you think you are, busting in here and beating people up like that?”

“It was mostly sleep spells that actually knocked them out,” she mutters.

Taako ignores that. “I’m gonna need one good reason why I shouldn’t blast you halfway back down to Faerun, and I’m gonna need it  _ now,” _ he says, ears flicking a little before pinning back against his head.

The Red Robe crosses her arms and remains thoroughly unimpressed. “I’m intangible, so you literally cannot do that,” she says.

Taako keeps up glaring at her, then sharply lowers the Umbra Staff and turns away. “Damn, I was hoping that bluff would land.”

“Your ears are too twitchy, ‘Ko, it gives you away,” she deadpans. “So, uh, can I get back to explaining—”

A bolt of divine magic shoots out from Merle’s outstretched hand, spearing right through the spectre’s shoulder before dissipating against a wall. “Okay, fine, if you want to fight, let’s just do it!” she says, gritting her teeth and rolling up her sleeves. “Maybe once you’re out of  _ spell slots _ then we can talk— who wants to go first!”

Merle steps up first, preparing a spell— and without even looking, the Red Robe snaps her fingers, and Merle trips on his own feet and collapses to the ground snoring.

And she looks— guilty? But Taako doesn’t know why— “I seriously wish it wasn’t so easy to stop you like that,” she mutters, digging around in her robes for something. “But man, if it works.”

Taako narrows his eyes, the tips of his ears flicking as he runs over the incantations of every spell he knows, and then he shifts back and rests a hand over his mouth to hide as he mutters the words for Charm Person. He can feel the spell settle into effect on her, can tell she should be thoroughly charmed— but when she turns to face him, it’s with her arms crossed and a sceptical look on her face.

“Really?” she asks. “Buddy. Taako. Listen. Nooot gonna work.”

Taako steps back, trying to look confused. “What? What’re you talking about? I didn’t do anything.”

“Charm Person isn’t gonna work, bro, I’m already supposed to be right by your side,” she says, extracting a small hip flask from her sleeve. “Which, hm. Incidentally.” She pauses to think, then holds the flask up. “Hey, you see this?”

Taako nods warily.

“The stuff in it is totally harmless, and in fact you drinking it could only lead to good things,” she says, then tosses it to Taako. Taako fumbles to catch it, managing to clap his hands around it, and he stares suspiciously at it for a long moment before looking back up at the Red Robe.

She just smiles serenely. “So,” she says, “Here’s a Suggestion: how’s about you take a swig of that-there flask, and then listen to me tell you about who I am and why I’m here?”

Taako stares at the flask for an uncomfortably long amount of time.

“Hey, you’re not seriously gonna—” Magnus starts, before Taako shrugs, puts the flask to his lips, and takes a huge swig of the contents. “Mm, lime flavor— okay, what was the point of that?”

Lup wordlessly lowers her hood, and when Taako raises his eyes to meet hers he realizes with a jolt that— oh, right, he has a sister.

And then,  _ god fucking damn it I have a sister how did I forget— _

And then the pain and vertigo and nausea hit and he finds himself on the ground, Magnus yelling something panicked in his ear and Lup saying something equally panicked and Taako tries to pick himself up— but he remembers, oh, yes, a hundred years. The Hunger. And all that other shit.

Lup is casting something again, he thinks, but he doesn’t have any time to figure out what before there’s another spike of pain and— then everything is black.

 

* * *

Magnus isn’t letting Lup close enough to try and help any more than putting Taako to sleep, which is perfectly reasonable given what he understands of the situation— weird spooky ghost lady just magically coerced Taako into drinking something, now he’s in huge pain and also unconscious. Perfectly reasonable not to trust her.

But, uh. That doesn’t stop her from getting  _ just a little _ upset over it.

“I’m just trying to help!” Lup insists, crackling and flickering a foot away and she’s sure her voice goes somewhere just a little extra spooky there, which doesn’t really help her case. “Just move—”

Magnus, standing guard over Taako’s unconscious form, doesn’t budge an inch. “You did this, I don’t know you—” Lup feels her form crackle again, feeling like an icy dagger just got thrown directly into her chest. “I’m not budging until you tell me exactly who you are and why you’re here.”

“...I’m Lup, Taako’s sister,” Lup finally grits out, and forces herself  _ not to get upset at the uncomprehending look on one of her family members’ face— _ “And I know that came out as complete static to you but  _ please—” _

She makes another move for Taako, but retreats when Magnus stomps at her hand. “Tell me what you can. I’m not moving.”

Lup stares him down, eyes wide and determined, until he blinks first. She glances down at the discarded flask, curses Taako for dropping it and wasting the remaining ichor, and then looks back up. “Fisher— the Voidfish could tell you. And hey— Ango’s probably there by now? He’ll tell you all about it!”

“Nope, not gonna fall for that,” Magnus says, crossing his arms.

“Suggestion: Go talk to the Voidfish,” Lup deadpans, unable to help the smirk of satisfaction as her spell takes effect. “It really misses you, y’know?”

Magnus stares blankly at her for a moment, visibly fighting with himself, then jerkily steps away. “You know, that’s a good idea! I’ll go do that, and then be right back.”

Lup nods, watching him go for a moment, before she perks up and calls after him again— “And remember to ask Angus for a drink!”

“Will do!” Magnus calls back, waving absently.

Lup nods. Then, the moment Magnus is out of sight, she dives down to Taako’s side, muttering anxiously. “Oh dear oh dear oh no, you okay there?” She pokes Taako on the cheek, earning a subconscious pained wince paired with him shifting away a little. “Okay that’s not good, uh, um, um, uh—”

“Geez, what happened here?” Merle asks, dropping to kneel next to Lup, and she will admit to being _ a little _ startled then, along with perhaps leaping to the other side of Taako. “I mean come on, I take a five minute power nap and everything goes to shit?”

_ You didn’t exactly choose the nap, _ Lup thinks, but doesn’t say. She does, however, lift a hand when Merle goes to shake Taako’s shoulder. “Okay, no, that’s just gonna make things worse I think?” Merle blinks up at her, silently questioning her, and she shrugs. “I mean, not exactly my field of expertise, but? This is, uh, lots of too much remembering happening all at once, and I’m pretty sure being awake is only gonna make it worse.”

Merle narrows his eyes. “And where do you get all this knowing about what this is?”

“Uh, I— I did this to him?” Lup says. “I mean, not intentionally— if I knew it’d incapacitate him like this—”

Taako interrupts her, then, with just a small movement— his hand twitching out in an attempt to grab her wrist, ears flicking around, eyes moving under his eyelids, and he mutters, “Lu?”

Instantly, Lup snaps her head down to face him, and rests her hand over his— focusing as hard as she can to keep it even the slightest bit tangible, cold as it may be, to let him feel  _ something _ of her however well he can. “I’m here, Taako.”

“Mmph,” Taako grumbles, curling up around that point, and then he says something, but it’s not in Common, and it takes Lup a moment to place as Elvish— because the last time either of them spoke it at any length was centuries ago, when they were still children. When it was all they knew.  _ “Mm cold, Lup,” _ he murmurs.  _ “It hurts.” _

And Lup forces a smile onto her face.  _ “I’m right here,” _ she says, squeezing his hand— but not too hard, in case what little physicality she has could break down. “I’m not going anywhere ‘til you wake up, ‘kay?” she says, switching to Common.

And Taako is still for a moment, then moves again to tug his hat down over his face and curl up around Lup’s hand. “M’kay,” he mutters, before relaxing back into a deeper sleep.

And Lup stares at him, for a very long moment, and eases her hand out of his grip— breathing an imaginary sigh of relief when it doesn’t disturb him in the slightest.

“Now what the heck was all that about?” Merle asks, startling Lup into remembering he’s right there. “That all got real dramatic it seems.”

“I super want to tell you all about it,” Lup says, “But, um, I can’t at this exact moment?” She looks ruefully at the discarded flask again. “But, uh. I’m not evil?”

“No, no, I figured if you were you at least care a little about this one particular person right here,” Merle says, waving a hand at Taako. “But hey, uh, while we’re here, mind telling me a little about yourself? Pass the time?”

Lup stares at him for a moment, head cocked, then slowly settles down on her heels. “Sure, why not,” she says, crossing her arms. “Let’s see what all can get through. Fucking— Lucretia can come to  _ me _ for all I care.”

“Hell yeah,” Merle says, resting his chin in his hands. “So, you know Taako? What’s the deal?”

“I mean, I’ve known him for both of our entire lives—”

“Cool, I caught none of that.”


	5. Could-Have-Been: A Louder Inoculation Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angus briefly attempts to be sneaky, is debatably successful in the long run.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *long drawn out wheeze* _why does writing have to be so hard and take so long. what is consistent and accurate characterization. i don't remember writing half of the lines in this thing and i'm very tired_

Roughly thirty minutes ago, having just gone his separate way from Lup, Angus McDonald arrives at the elevator to the Voidfish's chambers.

In another time, maybe, he’d accidentally gotten himself banned from entering the chamber— for his own good, as Johann though— but here and now, there was no such ban. And so, with little hesitation, he calls the elevator and steps in, adjusting his hat around the jellyfish hidden there.

He’s thought at length about how he’d go about this— how to avoid Johann noticing should he be there, how to keep the Director from realising until it’s too late— but it’s easy, remarkably, to just step into the room, nodding at the guards, and walk over to sit down next to Fisher’s tank.

“Hey, kiddo,” Johann greets after a moment, clearly engrossed in his work. Angus nods back, then turns to consider Fisher.

He lifts his hand up to his hat, fussing with it, and then freezes when the baby Voidfish chirps a note— and Fisher stills, and from the corner of his eye Angus sees Johann lift his head and look around in confusion.

“Hey, did you make that noise?” Johann asks, as Angus turns his head to meet his eyes. Angus shakes his head quickly, and Johann frowns. “Huh. Could’ve sworn I heard something...”

Fisher hums a couple notes—  _ B A B E— _ and the baby responds in kind, trying to echo each note but going just a little bit off. Johann blinks, his frown deepening, but he turns back to his work. “Weird reverb, I guess,” he mutters.

After a moment, Angus stands up, as quietly as he can manage, silently walking over to the feeding hatch to get this over with quickly. He has a sheet of blank paper in his hand, folded in half as if it contains an important secret, and he pretends to take his hat off nervously— and discreetly he puts the baby Voidfish and its toy boat on the paper, places the whole bundle in the slot, and resolutely pulls the lever.

Johann looks up at the sound, but Angus is too busy watching Fisher reach out to take the paper and eat it— no extra lights appear, because there’s nothing there to erase— and then gently start coaxing the baby away from curling up in the corner.

“What’d you just feed it,” Johann asks, turning his chair around. “You know you have to ask for clearance before erasing anything—”

“I-it was nothing,” Angus says, turning around quickly.

Johann looks skeptical. “Look, you’re welcome to your privacy—”

“No, I mean— I mean literally, it was a blank piece of paper. I wanted to see what would happen.”

Johann blinks. “...Oh. Well, I could’ve told you that, it just eats it and nothing happens.”

Angus shrugs. “I mean, I figured? But I wanted to see for myself.”

“Suit yourself,” Johann says, turning back to his work.

Angus looks back at the tank for a moment, finding Fisher showing Junior a duck, and after a moment Fisher lifts a tendril and waves— Angus waves back, nervously, and makes for the door.

Before he can reach it, though, it slams open to admit a thoroughly exuberant Magnus. “Hello! I’m here to visit the Voidfish!”

“Okay?” Angus says, stepping out of the way as Magnus marches firmly across the room and puts his hand on the glass.

“Hey buddy!” Magnus says, eyes passing right over the baby Voidfish to fix on Fisher with a wide grin. “How’ve you been?”

“I don’t think it’s gonna—” Johann starts, before Fisher cuts him off with a couple bright notes and cheerfully waves at Magnus. “...Uh. Guess I stand corrected.”

Angus frowns, finding Magnus’s exuberance suspicious, and quietly murmurs a Detect Magic and pads over.  _ There’s some Enchantment going on here, _ he thinks, looking closer to find Magnus’s eyes looking a little glassy.  _ I don’t know the spell, though… _

And then Magnus blinks, and beams down at Angus. “Oh, Ango! I wanted to see you too!”

Angus blinks. “Me?”

“Yeah, for— uh, what was that she said,” Magnus mutters, scratching at his head. “Uh, something about a drink...”

Angus stares at him for a long moment, and then his mouth clicks shut. “Ah.” He thinks for a moment, then bounces on his heels to go into bright-cheerful-kid mode. “Okay, I know what you mean now sir! Lemme just bring you somewhere else— without other people around— no come on you already talked to F— to the Voidfish!”

It takes some doing to corral Magnus out of the room and all the way to the elevator, and he’s sure the sight of a nerdy eleven-year-old herding a grown man is quite a scene— but Angus doesn’t care about that right now, he just wants to get somewhere Magnus can get inoculated without undue witnesses.

“Geez, pushy much?” Magnus asks, leaning against the doors after they close. “Where are we going anyway?”

“To go get the drink,” Angus says, though he has a bottle full of ichor in his bag. “Hey, you met L— some Red Robe, right?”

“Yeah, she gave Taako a drink and then he— collapsed?” He blinks, and Angus can see the enchantment around him flicker a little. “I— Why did I leave again?”

“...You had to talk to the Voidfish?” Angus asks. “Um, that’s not relevant here— uh, do you— are you sure that’s a good place to lean, sir?”

“What do you mean?” Magnus asks, and with perfect comedic timing the elevator door slides open and Magnus falls on his ass.

“That’s what I meant,” Angus says, stepping out and watching Magnus pick himself up as the doors slide shut. Then he reaches into his bag to retrieve the bottle of ichor and starts off down the hall. “Um— so, where’d you meet this Red Robe?”

“Did I mention she was a Red Robe?” Magnus wonders, jogging after Angus. “Oh, but she was in the main courtyard.”

Angus pauses to look out a window. “You mean the one with the huge bustling crowd around it?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah, that’s the one,” Magnus says, looking out at the same time. “You think we should check it out too?”

“...Let’s wait a minute,” Angus says, pushing Magnus away from the window and then starting to strain to open the bottle.

“Want some help?” Magnus asks, offering his hand, and Angus gives it to him. He easily twists it open and automatically takes a swig— and then gags on the taste. “Ugh, what is this, Voidfish Ichor? Ango, why do you have Voidfish Ichor in your water bottle?”

“In case I need to inoculate people, sir,” Angus says, taking the bottle back and screwing the lid back on. “So, um, you’re apparently originally from a world with a purple sky and two suns?”

Magnus reels back like he’s struck. “Oh jesus fuck you’re  _ right! _ How did—”

“Shhhhphhhshhhhhhh quiet sir!” Angus shushes urgently, looking around wildly. “No so loud! Someone’ll hear!”

“Sorry, sorry, I just—” He winces, cradles his head, and Angus panics a little.

“Um, uh, oh what do I do— oh maybe I should explain it to you?” Angus thinks it over for a second, then nods to himself.  “Um, try not to think ahead? It’ll probably go smoother if you keep your remembering at the same pace as I talk about things—”

“What the heck are you talking about—” Magnus winces again, and then mutters, “I’m gonna punch Lucretia. Gently. But also punch her.”

“Okay so you and Taako and Merle the Director and a couple other people were the Red Robes,” Angus hurries out, grabbing Magnus by the hand and dragging him in the direction of the courtyard. “And you traveled from world to world trying to escape this evil thing called the Hunger, which was eating worlds, and then you made the Relics to stop the Hunger? But then the Director decided that was a bad plan and made you all forget.”

“Well that fucking— ‘splains a lot,” Magnus groans, holding his head. “Ow— kinda get why, though? Not really worth it though...”

“Uh huh. So there was Lup also— Taako’s sister?” Magnus nods. “Um, and she made the Umbra Staff and also was possessing it, and helped me find Fisher’s baby to start inoculating people. We’ve been working together a bunch.”

Magnus grumbles something under his breath, but Angus doesn’t hear it over the murmur of the crowd that hits them the moment he pushes the door open. There’s something big going on, Angus can tell, something bigger than just a Red Robe— big enough that everyone is just standing around watching instead of taking action.

Angus pushes into the crowd, and he’s sure it must be an interesting sight to see tiny little Angus holding Magnus’s hand to keep him from getting separated as opposed to the other way round. It’s thoroughly necessary, though.

He pauses, once he reaches the edge of the crowd, and stands up on the tips of his toes to peek over people’s shoulders without making himself too obvious— and he can see Lup there, talking, standing up from a vigil at an unconscious Taako’s side. Merle is already standing, looking confusedly between Lup and— the Director, who merely stands there leveling a stoic stare at Lup.

Angus lets go of Magnus’s hand, trusting him not to do anything too rash, and creeps around the edge of the crowd to get somewhere a little closer— taking full advantage of his size to squeeze past with minimal inconvenience. Soon, he manages to pick out some words, though admittedly they’re not worth much given how loudly Lup says them.

“This is  _ your _ fault, Lucretia!” Lup is insisting, probably in response to something the Director said. “Believe me, if I could’ve done it any other way I would’ve— but the fact that I  _ had _ to was  _ entirely _ your fault!”

Angus peeks through the gap between people’s arms just in time to catch the pained, guilty look on the Director’s face. “Please, Lup, I wish I could’ve done it any other way—”

“You could’ve!” Lup insists. “You could’ve let my brother fucking  _ remember me!” _

A murmur goes through the crowd,  _ was that Voidfish static, why is there a Red Robe, why does she know the Director’s name, what are they talking about, what happened to Taako— _ and then Angus sees, from across the clearing of the crowd, Magnus step out into the open and stride purposefully towards the Director.

And Angus thinks,  _ Why did I think he’d be sensible? _

“Lucretia,” Magnus greets, and the Director turns in surprise. He stops, and cracks a grin. “What’s the sitch?”

The Director blinks, visibly thrown off. “Magnus? You’re…  _ are _ you…?”

Lup stares at him for a moment too, then glances around until her eyes catch on Angus in the crowd. Angus gives her a tentative thumbs-up before vanishing back into the crowd before she can respond, circling closer to see if there’s anything he can do about Merle— who’s looking increasingly confused.

Taako stirs, Angus notices as he sticks his head out again. It’s just a little, shifting position slightly, eyelids flickering, but Angus finds himself relieved— seeing such a boisterous presence in his life lying crumpled motionless is… more than a little upsetting, even if he logically knows he’s just asleep. So a little confirmation that Taako continues to be alive is nice.

“How’ve you been?” Magnus asks, while Angus turns his attention to the scene in general to see if there’s any way to divert even more attention away from himself. “I’ve been great. Learning all kinds of old things about myself. Old fashion choices and all that. Old friends.”

“...Alright, so you have remembered,” the Director says, after a moment. She sighs. “Alright, fine. I— I can work with this. Could we go somewhere a little more private?”

“Nah,” Magnus says, dropping down to sit cross-legged on the ground. “I like it here. The grass is nice.”

“Yeah,” Lup says, zipping over to sit next to him. “Plus we can go people-watching! And reverse people-watching.”

The Director sighs and rests her forehead against her staff. “I don’t know why I bother trying to act like you’re anything other than a group of disorganized chucklefucks.”

“You’re a chucklefuck too, Lucy.”

Tentatively, Angus breaks away from the crowd and walks casually over to Merle, bottle in hand. “Hey, sir?” he says, voice just quiet enough that he can hardly be heard over the crowd, and he lifts the bottle of ichor. “I think this’ll probably help.”

Merle stares at him for a moment, then down at the bottle, and then he shrugs. “What the hell,” he says, taking the bottle and cracking it open. “Today’s been weird enough as-is, may as well let it happen.”

He downs a gulp of the bottle, winces at the taste, and hands it back. “So, what’s the deal?”

Angus opens his mouth to answer, but then there’s a wooden thump— like the base of a staff hitting the ground— and then a golden dome flickers into existence and the murmur of the crowd just vanishes.

“I really don’t want to discuss this in front of everyone,” the Director says, voice suddenly deafening in the silence. Angus looks up, and he can see the vague shapes of everyone around the large dome they’re surrounded by, but nothing past that. “So at the very least, we can have a moment’s privacy in here.”

Lup looks around, glancing for just a moment at Angus before looking up at the top of the dome. “So you’re trapping us in here until we talk this out like normal people.”

“Actually, you can leave whenever you want,” the Director says. “You can’t come back in, though.”

“Oh, good to know,” Lup deadpans, crossing her arms. She glances at Angus again, meeting his eyes, before looking back at the Director— and she tilts her head a little, flicks her hand, and Angus gets the message.  _ Get outta here. _

Angus doesn’t particularly want to, though, so instead he nudges Merle in their direction and crouches down next to Taako to prod his shoulder.

Taako groans quietly and shifts away, which Angus takes as a good sign.

“Could one of you explain to me what the devil is going on?” Merle asks loudly, drawing all attention back to him. “‘Cause lemme tell you, I’m getting a bit of a headache here, and it’s only half due to the static.”

“Oh, yeah, sure,” Magnus says, trotting over. “I’m pretty sure I got most of it alright, lemme fill you in...”

Angus tunes him out, focusing back on attempting to nudge Taako awake. “Sir,” he whispers, shaking Taako’s shoulder. “It’s time to get up, sir.”

Taako grumbles, trying to reach for where his hat should be and grabbing only air— it fell off at some point, and is now lying on the ground several feet away— before settling on throwing his arm over his eyes. “‘S too early, Angus.”

“No, actually, I’m pretty sure it’s actually the middle of the afternoon,” Angus says, settling back on his heels. “And also, you’re asleep in the middle of the quad instead of in bed. And you’re missing a whole lot of action.”

Taako grumbles again, before blinking, twitching his hand— and then he jolts upright with an alarmed cry of “Where’s— Lup?!”

And within moments Lup abandons her silent glaring contest with the Director to rush over, skidding to a stop by Taako’s side, saying “Oh you’re finally awake I’m right here you feeling okay?!”

And Taako winces. “Little loud there, Lulu.”

“Sorry,” Lup says, softer. “You okay? If I weren’t already dead I’m pretty sure I’d’ve had a heart attack and died from the fright you gave me.”

“Oh, you’re one to talk,” Taako mutters, rubbing at his eyes. “Hey, what happened to ‘back soon’? Did someone change the definitions of one or both of those words? Because last I checked, when combined in that order they’re generally agreed to mean ‘I will return within a timeframe no longer than perhaps a week’ and ten years seems a  _ little _ over that.”

“It was an accident?” Lup tries.

The Director gently clears her throat, drawing everyone’s attention back to her, and takes a small step forward. “...Taako? Are you… are you alright?”

Taako narrows his eyes, ears pinning back, and turns away. “If I didn’t have a headache right now I’d totally blast you.”

“Nothing technically stopping you,” Lup says.

Taako thinks it over for a moment. “...You also have the umbrella right now. Can I have it? I left my spare wand in my room.”

“No, I like my umbrella. You can suck it.”

“You don’t even  _ need _ it! You’re a lich!”

“And it’s  _ my _ umbrella, so I get to decide what happens to it!”

“Um, sirs, ma’am—”

“Not  _ now, _ Angus,” Lup hisses. “Didn’t you see my cryptic and easily missable gestures? Get out before—”

“I think it’s a little late for that,” Angus deadpans, tilting his head towards where the Director is staring at him.

“Angus,” she greets. “...I suppose I should’ve realized you were involved, given your nerves.”

Angus nods nervously. “Um, I’m sorry? I— I wanted to tell you, but I didn’t… actually know if you could be trusted, given the whole, um. Erasing all your friends’ memories.”

She winces. “Yes, I suppose that would be grounds for not wanting to trust me.”

“No shit,” Lup says, standing up. “Hey speaking of which, mind if I—”

“Please don’t punch the Director, ma’am,” Angus says quickly, stepping in between the two of them. “She really has the right idea? Let’s just, um talk it out? Peacefully? Sans punches?”

“Can  _ I _ at least punch her?” Taako asks.

“Uh.” Angus looks at the Director, and she shakes her head. “No, sir.”

“Well, fuck this then.” Taako lies back down and pulls his hat over his face. “I’m gonna sleep off this migraine again, wake me up when you’re done doing boring talky words.”

“Sure, sir.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [oh yeah and here's some more AUT fanart by tumblr user welshattack. HELL YEAH.](http://brushstrokesapocalyptic.tumblr.com/post/165102831309/i-made-you-some-fan-art-of-an-umbrella-term-this)


End file.
